SOMEONE PLEASE STOP TAKING LIAM NEESON’S FAMILY!!! Ok, so maybe ‘The Commuter‘ isn’t so much about having his family ‘Taken’, but they get threatened to get taken, and that’s close enough.

So “The Commuter” is here simply to prove that Liam Neeson is still an action hero, and to be fair, he is probably our best action hero.  At age 65, he’s doing stuff that Tom Cruise wishes he could have done in his 30’s.  Actually, this felt like a role that was written for Tom Cruise until someone realized that Tom Cruise is box office poison but everyone loves Liam Neeson probably because of Love Actually.

But you probably want to know about the film.  Well, have you seen Taken?  Also, Taken 2?  Also, Taken 3?  Then there was that movie that Liam Neeson did, “Non-Stop,” and that was suspiciously like Taken on a plane.  Well, here’s Taken on a train! 

Actually, the movie started out really strong.  The opening sequence is quite striking; it serves as an homage to Grand Central Station and a look into the lives of people who have to live day after day traveling to and from work and home.  Then all of a sudden, it’s a mindless action movie.  It throws some whodunnit moments at you to make you think that the film is much deeper than it actually is, but it totally isn’t.

Now I must say some of the good things.  It is FULL of action.  Liam Neeson is a gift to the silver screen.  There’s a reason he’s made Taken 5 times already, and it’s because Neeson is awesome.  You want him to get into these impossible situations because you hope that one day, when you’re 65, you’ll be able to kick as much ass as Liam Neeson.  What I’m saying is that I love Liam Neeson.

Long story short, this feels like a 90’s action movie a-la “Speed,” but on a train with Liam Neeson.  If you are looking for exactly that, then this is a rousing success!  If you want an actual cinematic experience, you’ve got a better chance of getting Taken and then having Liam Neeson come to rescue you.  (FOR MY OWN SAKE SOMEBODY PLEASE STOP ME!!!!)


Written By: Fernando Martinez

By Bryan Kluger

Former husky model, real-life Comic Book Guy, genre-bending screenwriter, nude filmmaker, hairy podcaster, pro-wrestling idiot-savant, who has a penchant for solving Rubik's Cubes and rolling candy cigarettes on unreleased bootlegs of Frank Zappa records.

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