Hi everyone, Bryan Here…


It’s 2016 and that means more and more movies will be coming out for all of us to spend all of our hard earned money on. If you’re a fan of the horror genre, here is a look at what horror movies to expect this year. This is not the ‘be all – end all’ horror movie list for 2016. There will be more that come out for sure, so keep your eyes peeled. That being said, this is a good starting guide for what to expect. There looks to be some great ones as well as some not so great ones. Let us know what excites you most.


‘The Boy’ Jan. 21st

Another beginning of the year horror movie that is rated PG-13. The premise looks interesting enough with a nanny taking a job to look after a couple’s “kid” that died 20 years prior, but is in the form of a doll now. Looks a bit creepy and I’m sure there will be some minor moments of fright. Let’s hope for the best here so that we can get more horror doll movies. We need a  new ‘Chucky’ movie come to think of it.


‘The 5th Wave’ Jan. 21st

Here is what looks like a big budget prologue to this summer’s ‘Independence Day’ sequel that stars Chloe Grace Moretz. The trailers show us that a bunch of aliens in their big spaceships basically wipe out Earth as Chloe and her family try to survive. She meets some interesting characters along the way. The trailer here looks great, but again, this is early in the year, so anything is possible.


Rob Zombie’s ’31’

I’m actually not quite sure when this comes out, but according to IMDB, it’s this date. That being said, this won’t open wide on this date, but rather at a film festival. Let’s hope it gets a wide release soon, because this sounds awesome. I’m a fan of Zombie’s work and this film titled ’31’ just sound a like a blast. This centers around five carnies that are kidnapped and forced to play a game of 31 on Halloween. What is 31? These five carnies have to survive twelve hours in a maze-like warehouse where 31 serial killer clowns are running around wild. Rob, you never fail to impress.


‘Pride, Prejudice, and Zombies’ Feb. 5th

I remember when this book came out back in 2008. This is a fun take on a classic tale from literature. Basically take the story of ‘Pride and Prejudice’ and add a ton of blood thirsty zombies to it. This should go well with ‘Sense and Sensibility and Sea Monsters’. This should be a lot of fun.


‘Southbound’ Feb. 5th

Hooray, a horror anthology film that follows a group of travelers that cross paths on a desert highway. Tons of death, carnage, and horror can be expected here. Looking forward to these tales of mayhem.


‘The Witch’ Feb. 19th

This movie was shown at last year’s Fantastic Fest and pretty much everyone LOVED IT. The director even won Best Director at Sundance last year for this film, which takes place in 1630 and is all sorts of horrifying. Pets turn violent, crops don’t grow, children go missing, and people become possessed by evil. There is witchcraft and of course some nasty witches. This is sure to be far better than Vin Diesel’s last film, ‘The Last Witch Hunter’.


‘Rings’ April 1st

Since this is coming out on April Fool’s Day, I don’t really know what to expect, but this is supposed to be a prequel to ‘The Ring’. Yes. That ‘Ring’ film where the videotape kills you and the chick bursts out of the television. This is supposed to take place before that infamous tape was created and shown, but you can expect some creepy things here. Crazy to think there’s been like a dozen of these ‘Ring’ movies so far.


‘Before I Wake’ April 8th

Here we have Kate Bosworth and Thomas Jane in a horror movie of the supernatural kind. Bosworth and Jane play a couple who adopt a young boy who has some severe nightmares. These nightmares aren’t just nightmares, but might be something more sinister. Maybe Freddy will show up?


‘Amityville: The Reawakening’ April 15th

And yet we have here another remake of ‘The Amityville Horror’ with Jennifer Jason Leigh starring. Let’s hope this is as good as ‘The Conjuring’ and doesn’t rely on cheap scares or silliness. The original ‘Amityville Horror’ film is classic and I hope they can capture the essence of the original while keeping things fresh here. This isn’t the first time this has been remade, and I’m positive it’s not the last. Bring on the flies.


‘The Conjuring 2’ June 10th

So here is where modern horror filmmakers and movies have done things right. The first ‘Conjuring’ film was fantastic and scary as hell. Only coming out a couple of years ago, the film still holds up on multiple viewings and has etched its way into one of the top horror movies. The crew of the first film has returned to tell the tales of Ed and Lorraine Warren, who are the paranormal investigators from the first film. The subtitle to this film is called ‘The Enfield Poltergeist’ and is just one of the many cases the Warrens had. Another famous one they had was ‘The Amityville Horror’. I hear this sequel is supposed to be even scarier than the original film. Can’t wait.


‘Independence Day 2: Resurgence’ June 24th

Yes, this movie is on this list, because it has aliens killing humans and that is some scary ass shit. Luckily we still have Judd Hirsch and Jeff Goldblum to help out again. I have no doubt this is going to be absolutely ridiculous and silly, but it might just be a lot of fun too. Sadly there won’t be any Randy Quaid here, but there won’t be any Will Smith here either, so it has that going for it. Let’s just hope Judd Hirsch has a big role and takes out an alien ship. How awesome would that be?


‘The Purge 3’ July 1st

I’m a fan of ‘The Purge’ films. They have their flaws, but they are a lot of fun, scary, and a ‘knock-you-over-the-head’ preaching mentality on social and political issues. Mainly being the class system. If you’re unfamiliar, ‘The Purge’ is an annual event in America where people have twelve hours to “purge” their anger and hate. This means that for twelve hours, everything is LEGAL, including rape and murder. From the last film, it left off with an uprising of low income people, attacking rich folks and headed to the government offices. Let’s hope it stays that course, because Omar from ‘The Wire’ leads this uprising.

Screen Shot 2016-01-09 at 8.08.19 PM

‘Lights Out’ July 22nd

Here is a supernatural horror film, starring Teresa Palmer that I don’t know too much about, other than it was a short film before it was a feature film and centered on a boy and his mother who are haunted by evil spirits when the lights go out. I’m sure you can find the short film online somewhere, but this will be produced by ‘Saw’ creator James Wan.

Screen Shot 2016-01-09 at 8.08.54 PM

‘Patient Zero’ Sept. 2nd

Natalie Dormer and Stanley Tucci are in this ‘zombie’ film or shall I say, a movie about the human race being plagued by a vicious plague of super rabies. We will have probably have seen all the twists and turns in this film. Let’s just hope for something new and original. Bring on ‘Zombieland 2’ instead, please.


‘Delirium’ Sept. 30th

Topher Grace is released from a mental asylum to inherit his parent’s mansion, which is haunted. Or is it all in his mind. Topher has come a long way since ‘That 70’s Show’ and playing poker.


‘Underworld 5’ Oct. 14th

Ugh. Really? Haven’t we said all we had to say with the previous four films? Do we really need a 5th werewolf vs. vampire film? Give me a break. I’m only up for this movie if Wesley Snipes shows up as ‘Blade’.


‘Oujia 2’ Oct. 21st

I’m actually quite surprised this is getting a sequel. Then again, I’m really not, since it only cost a few million bucks to make and went on to make way more than that. You know the drill, people get a Ouija board, they use it, they summon evil, people die, THE END.


‘Strangers 2’ Dec. 2nd

Almost a decade after the first, film, we are finally getting a sequel with ‘Strangers 2’. This time, all of the horrors take place in a trailer park. Just in time for the holidays.

By Bryan Kluger

Former husky model, real-life Comic Book Guy, genre-bending screenwriter, nude filmmaker, hairy podcaster, pro-wrestling idiot-savant, who has a penchant for solving Rubik's Cubes and rolling candy cigarettes on unreleased bootlegs of Frank Zappa records.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *