Film Review: ‘Bloodsucking Bastards’!

by Gumbercules9000 on Sep 3rd, 2015

Fernando M., Here…


It’s sophomoric, juvenile, low budget, lacks any name recognition actors, but I dare say I had a good time watching it.

Blood Sucking Bastards is what happens when a comedy troupe gets together and says, “Hey, remember that great movie, Office Space?  What if it had vampires?”  Actually, I am 90% sure those were the exact words uttered to start this creative process.  As you can imagine, this kind of idea would only appeal to a very small percentage of the population.  Fortunately for that small percentage, this movie did get green-lit.

It’s created specifically for fans of off beat comedy, stoners, and kids who are looking for something to match a drinking game to, in that order.  With that in mind, the film is riddled with hilarious one liners and classic dead pan humor.  And also there’s vampires.


The cast is led by geek favorite Fran Kranz, known for his work in the Whedonverse, as the protagonist and possibly only recognizable face in the crowd.  The rest of the cast is obviously inexperienced, but somehow this adds a certain charm; you can tell this was made by people who love comedy and love movies.  Also, Matthew Lillard shows up, and nobody knows why, but he’s in this for a whopping 15 seconds.

Listen, it’s really not that good of a movie when compared to stuff you’ll see in theaters.  However, if you miss the good old days of Broken Lizard movies (Club Dread, Super Troopers), this might be right up your alley.  For a movie coming to DVD and On Demand, it’s worth a good laugh, and it’s nice to know that independent comedy and independent cinema still have an outlet.


– Fernando Martinez

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Movie Quotes

[Captain Typho is trying to talk Padme out of leaving Coruscant without protection]
Captain Typho:
My Lady, let me come with you.
There is no danger. The fighting is over, and... this is personal.
[Typho bows]
Captain Typho:
As you wish, My Lady... but I strongly disagree.
I'll be all right, Captain. This is something I must do myself. Besides, Threepio will look after me.
Oh, dear.
[Typho leaves; Padme and C-3PO board the Naboo skiff; Obi-Wan sneaks on board]
Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith (2005) The Movie Quotes